Sunday, September 16, 2012

Grateful

Obviously I haven't posted in a few weeks but I promise I have already started writing down what I need to post about. all of the fun things we have really been looking forward to have come and gone and I can't wait to share them. For now I wanted to write a little post about the past week. I really want to remember my thoughts and feelings about it.

On Sunday afternoon after taking a nap I woke up to our apartment looking like it was filled with smoke. Andrew was gone home teaching and I was just really confused at what was going on. I walked around and sniffed trying to figure out why it looked so weird. I finally gave up and started doing some reading. Slowly the fogginess went away in my right eye but not in my left. The rest of the night I had a slight fog in my left eyes vision.

On Monday morning I woke up for classes and could barely open my left eye. Water kept running out like I was crying but only in one eye. It felt like something was in my eye and every time I moved it it stung and burned. I called the health center and asked if I should come in and they said yes immediately especially because it was my eyes. Well Andrew had to go to work and I was just freaking out obviously so I grabbed as many tissues as I could and went to the doctor right away. He was no help and said that I need to see a specialist so for $25 he recommended an eye doctor. (I hate having to pay to go to the doctor and they tell you they don't know or they can't do anything about it but you still have to pay..lame)

Luckily Andrew was able to take half of the day off and take me to this eye doctor man. Right when I got in the office they put numbing drops in both my eyes, and let me tell you it was the GREATEST 15 minutes of that ENTIRE day. I felt like I could see normally again. Well right when he looked at my eyes he says well is your right eye hurting and I was like well I didn't think so, I thought the pain was just radiating and he said well it should be hurting because you have a lot of scratches and erosion going on.
My thoughts = Oh crap, not both eyes!
Then he proceeds to tell me that my left eye is pretty much horrible and I have a huge erosion and scratches right in the middle of it. We spend a few minutes talking about how it could have happened and we got nothing. We have no idea how this happened. My eyes pretty much looked like they had road rash on them and I have no idea what caused it. and now I will proceed to prevent this from ever happening again by doing..... oh yea i don't know. The doctor even said this was the worst case he has ever seen in 15 years or working. He has no idea how I got it and for that matter in BOTH eyes. crrrazy.

To shorten this long story up I spent the next four days with my eyes pretty much closed all of the time. Monday and Tuesday were officially the worst days of my life. I was blind and couldn't do anything. My eyes felt like they had needles stabbing them they whole time. I would concentrate so hard to not move my eyes even when they were closed and let me tell you that is no easy task. They hurt. Wednesday is when I started "seeing the light" (ha no pun intended) I could start opening my eyes a little more and more. Light was just killer up until Wednesday night and I slowly started to be okay with it.

Now I don't write this for people to feel bad for me. I write this honestly for myself to remember.
I have never in my life been so grateful for the ability to see. God has given us these amazing amazing bodies and everyday they are able to perform to the ability we want them to (for the most part). I know I complain about my body and certain things it does or ways it makes me feel but this past week I truly realized how grateful I am for it. How amazing it is. How cool it is that we can see, hear, talk, feel, breath, move, everything. God has blessed us so greatly. I am grateful for this beautiful amazing body that I have. I am grateful for the priesthood and the beautiful gift it is in my life. and the ability those who hold the priesthood have to give blessings. I am grateful for the gift of patience that God has helped me work on this week. I am grateful for a husband who was able to help comfort me and give me strength through this and help me with so many things I couldn't have done on my own.

I really do not want to forget how grateful I am for these things. I feel like I take advantage of these simple but not so simple things, like seeing, everyday and I hope now I can make sure to thank my Heavenly Father often for these wonderful gifts.

Now lets all start off this next week being thankful for what we have! I know I will be.
love,alex&andrew

ps. if you read this whole thing to the end. I am very proud of you. you deserve a bright yellow sparkly sticker :)

1 comment:

  1. I am glad that you were able to regain your sight again. It is very scary because you still don't even know how that happened. Be well!

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